Date Rape

An unexpected threat from an unlikely source.

This is one of the most common statements victims of date or acquaintance rape make. It isn’t always a man hiding in the bushes, or under a stoop or in an alley who grabs a woman as she walks by. Date or acquaintance rape can occur when a boy and girl are on a date, he wants sex and she doesn’t, so he just sort of attacks her to get her to cooperate. Not only are the victims confused about what rape is, but so is society.

Defining Rape
According to the law, say lawyers working with Coalitions Against Sexual Assault, sexual assault is sexual contact that is forced or done without the person’s consent. Rape is a form of sexual assault that includes sexual intercourse. Different states use different terms for the types of sexual assaults. Some divide it into first-, second-, third-, or fourth-degree sexual assault. Other states use different terms.

Relationships Between Rapist and Victims
A friend or acquaintance turning into a date rapist is more common that we’d like to think. Bureau of Census data, reporting in “Most Recent U.S. Rape and Sexual Assault Statistics,” showed the following:

• Well known to the victim………...35%
• Casual acquaintances…………...21%
• Relatives………………………..…11%
• Strangers…………………….…….33%

What Rights Do You Have In A Relationship?
• You have the right to an equal relationship.
• You have the right to not to be dominated.
• You have the right to act one way with one person and a different way with someone else.
• You have the right to change your mind whenever you want to.
• You have the right to reject unwanted attention.
• You have the right to start a relationship slowly.
• You have the right to say: “I want to know you better before I get more involved.”
• You have the right to be yourself without changing to suit others.
• You have the right to change a relationship when your feelings change. You have the right to say, “We used to be close, but I want something else now.”
• You have the right to want physical closeness.
• You have the right to dress and act the way you want to without promising to have sex.
• You have the right to say “no.”

The Significant Role Of Alcohol And Drugs
In a recent study, 75 percent of men and 55 percent of women involved in date or acquaintance rape said they had used alcohol or other drugs before it happened.

Alcohol
Clearly drinking in excess is a dangerous thing to do. A judge or a jury won’t care that you were drunk–you are responsible for what you do. That includes how much you consumed and what you did as a result of that drinking. Rape is always the rapist’s fault, no matter who was drinking or how much.

If you are a female, drinking too much may blur your thinking and judgement, so you might miss the warning signals you would see if you were sober. If you are drunk you may not be able to think clearly enough to resist or act on a chance to get away. If you pass out, you can be raped and not even know it. Rape is never the victim’s fault even if she was drunk; however, getting drunk can put a person in a very dangerous situation.

Drugs
As if alcohol weren’t enough trouble, there’s now something new––drugs that can make a victim pass out and be unaware of what is happening to her. The brand name of these drugs is Rohypnol® (generic name: flunitrasepam). It is a relative of tranquilizers like Valium but many times more powerful. Someone who is high on this drug is often said to be “roached.” Rohypnol tablets are round and white, a little smaller than an aspirin. Rohypnol manufacturer Hoffmann-LaRoche now coats the pills with a dye so that a drink in which it’s dissolved in will turn blue, but not all manufacturers of flunitrazepam do that.

Another drug is GHB (for gamma hydroxy butyrate), sometimes called liquid ecstasy, great hormones, liquid X, or other names. It is a clear liquid that can be made by amateurs in a bathtub. GHB is a terribly dangerous drug because it’s a central nervous system depressant, which means it can shut down breathing. Sometimes it’s sneaked into drinks, but other times it’s just passed around in a water bottle or jar. It is colorless and odorless, but it has a somewhat salty taste, which is sometimes disguised by mixing the drug with a sweet-tasting liquor or soft drink.

There are also other drugs, less well known. One is burundanga, a drug that comes from Colombia and makes people forget what’s happened to them. Another is ketamine, a veterinary anesthetic, used during surgery on animals. It’s sometimes stolen from veterinarians’ offices.

Some men have the idea that if a woman drinks or takes drugs to the point that she doesn’t know what’s going on, or if she has passed out, they can get away with having sex with her. But a federal law called the Drug-Induced Rape Prevention and Punishment Act of 1996 makes it a crime punishable by up to twenty years in prison for anyone to use a controlled substance to commit a violent crime, including sexual assault.

How Some Sates Define Date Or Acquaintance Rape
Some states define rape as sex without consent–if the victim doesn’t give permission or stays quiet, it’s rape. Still in other states, rape is an act of force––ithe victim has to show the rapist that the action is unwanted (keeping quiet would mean consent in some states). Some states include oral or anal sex as rape; some define it only as vaginal sex. In many states, a person under a certain age is not considered able to give consent, so sexual contact with a person under that age is always rape. In many states, as well as under federal law, having sexual contact with someone who is unconscious or under the influence of drugs or alcohol is also rape because that person can’t give consent. If you want to know what the law in your state is, call a rape crisis line, a group for sexual assault prevention, or your state attorney general’s office.

Where To Find Help
There are hundreds of local community-based organizations, faith-based organizations and federal, state and local hotlines and support groups. The following organizations provide help or information in dealing with issues of date rape–specailly its prevention and treatment:

Domestic
125 N. Enola Drive
Enola, PA 17024
Phone: 717 728-9764
Fax: 717 728-9781

National Coalition Against Sexual Assault (NCASA)
125 N. Enola Drive
Enola, PA 17024
Phone: 717 728-9764
Fax: 717 728-9781
E-mail: ncasa@redrose.net
Web Site: www.achiever.com/freempg/ncas>

Rape, Abuse & Incest National Network (RAINN)
Toll-free, confidential rape crisis hot line (can connect you to your local crisis center, twenty-four hours a day):
Phone: 800 656-HOPE
800 656-4673